Feeling Uninspired.

I haven’t posted in a while, and frankly it’s because I haven’t felt inspired. A lot of what I consider to be my best work in the past were written from my true emotion at the time. But the thing is, I only ever feel like writing when I’m slightly somber or down. Which is why, since my mood has improved drastically over the past month, I can’t seem to put words to paper without feeling fake or insincere. I started posting things that I thought might get views, instead of my usual rambly thoughts. It just didn’t feel like me so I stopped.

It reminded me of how we sometimes try to act a certain way in order to get other people’s approval. I lived that way for a long time, which only drew me further and further away from my true self. So I’m going to take my own advice and write what I want when I feel like it. It’s like how they say your hobby turns into a chore when you make it your job (or a least I think that’s what they say). I may stick to my schedule of posting three times a week, or I may not. It’s whatever I want. I will continue to ramble on about anything and everything whether or not people actually read it. That’s it.

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10 Before 20

As I am approaching my 20th birthday, here are 10 things that I’ve learnt in the past 20 years.

1. We are allowed to dream. But there are times when sacrifices have to be made in order for dreams to come true. It sucks, but you have to follow the rules if you want to win the game.

2. You can read as many philosophical books as you want, but you’ll still be broken if you don’t risk hurting yourself to pick up the shattered pieces. Working through emotions is painful – soul wrenchingly painful. But you gotta do what you gotta do.

3. Yes, other people’s photos may look pretty on the internet. But you’ll never get anywhere if you’re so busy obsessing over their lives that you forget about your own.

4. There is no rulebook for life. So do whatever you want no matter what people say. Own it while you’re at it.

5. You don’t have to be perfect. In fact, trying to be perfect was my downfall, like it has been for so many years. Make mistakes. Heck, make as many mistakes as it takes for you to get to where you want to be. Just make sure you stand back up every time.

6. The words that we have to hear the most can be the most difficult to accept. It’s easy to block out the world, to run away from everything when you’re hurting. But you’ll have to stop and face the truth somehow. It’s only a matter of time.

7. The magic happens in the in between – the grey area. The part where you get a bit of everything. The part where you get to experience all the ups and downs in life.

8. Maybe some of us are destined to be wanderers. We may not have everything figured out. We may not know what we want. But we know to follow our hearts.

9. What we don’t like about other people is usually related to what we don’t like about ourselves. The negative words that we say about others reveal more about ourselves than them.

10. The things that we worry about on a daily basis are extremely insignificant in the grand scheme of things. That plane you thought you might miss? When you worried about how you look in that dress? How many of those things do you still remember today?

Body Shaming.

I have dealt with body image issues my entire life. Not once did I ever feel comfortable in my own skin. Not when I was overweight; not when I was underweight. My body has been through a lot, but it never failed to keep me alive. Every second of everyday, my heart keeps on pumping blood through my veins; my legs allow me to walk from one place to another; I can see and do so many amazing things thanks to my body. But I failed to see this the whole time.

I’ve blamed society for creating unrealistic expectations for adolescence today. I’ve blamed the people around me for pointing out my size when I was a kid as if it’s a bad thing. I’ve blamed myself for letting all of this happen. But now I know that if it weren’t for all those things, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I wouldn’t be able to rejoice on the fact that I feel the most confident I ever have in my body right now. The best part is that I’m not even what society deems as ‘perfect’. I’ve learnt that I will always be dissatisfied with myself no matter what if I continue to seek approval from external sources. I’ve learnt that what other people think has no value to me. They’re probably too busy thinking about themselves anyway.

I could go on about how brainwashed we all are when it comes to body shaming. How we allow whoever it is to tell us that thin=good and fat=bad. How bigger people are immediately assumed to be lazy, indulgent and greedy people. How we look down on them like they’re somehow less worthy than others just because of their size. I remember when I was 10, I told my friend that I’ve never spoken to this other girl in our class. She asked ‘Why? Is it because she’s fat?’. I remember thinking how I need to lose weight when I was 5, in kindergarten. I remember how every single adult that met me for the first time would say my baby fat would go away once I get older. I remember pinching on my belly fat, wishing I could cut it off with a knife. These things haunt you for life.

My point is, I wish we could stop obsessing over external appearances and start realising that there is so much more to life. The moment I stopped worrying about my weight was the moment I started living again. I wish dieticians would stop saying harsh things to patients when most of them have been thin their whole life and have no idea what it’s like to live as a bigger person in a world that glorifies thinness. I wish doctors would actually treat an obese person’s disease instead of telling them they need to lose weight. Most importantly, I wish people would stop putting labels on people based on their appearance.

Everyone has their own struggles. This is mine.

The 10 Best Things in Life

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1. When you and your best friend happen to say the same thing at the same time.

2. When a book is so good that you stay up to read no matter how tired you are.

3. Getting into bed after a long and tiring day.

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4. Watching the sun rise on a beautiful morning.

5. Accomplishing something that you feel extremely proud of.

6. Cuddling an animal. Extra points if it’s fluffy.

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7. Listening to the sound of waves crashing onto the shore.

8. Reading something that resonates with you completely.

9. Seeing amazing people around you succeed when you’ve believed in them all along.

10. Being able to look back in life and remind yourself how far you’ve come.

Weekly Snapshot 24.01.18

Quote of the Week

“Don’t surrender all your joy for an idea you used to have about yourself that isn’t true anymore.”
― Cheryl StrayedTiny Beautiful Things

Beautiful quotes like this makes my heart sigh. It’s like knowing that everything is ok and that you’re not crazy for feeling the way you are.

I was caught up in thinking how the past me would judge the current me so badly because I am so far from where I thought I would be now. But then my friend reminded me that people change and that’s ok. My 19 year old self had no way of knowing how my life would play out for the many years to come. Change is uncomfortable but I’m getting comfortable with the discomfort.

 

Book of the Week

Inward by Yung Pueblo

I admit, I have slightly cheated with this because it’s more-so a collection of poems than a book, which makes it an incredibly quick read. Nevertheless, I still wanted to share this since it is filled with gems of wisdom.

I’ve followed Yung Pueblo on Instagram for a while now. Not sure how I stumbled upon his work, but he is definitely an underrated poet on social media. All of his poems include messages that every single one of us need to hear right now. Here are a few of my favourites from his Instagram feed.

 

Photo of the Week

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This is a prime example of how I like to take photos of weird things. There was a gorgeous view of the ocean right on the other side of this. But no, I decided to turn around and take this instead. My favourite thing about photography is being able to show the beauty in things that people usually disregard.

 

Sonf of the Week 2

Gold Digger – Kanye West and Jamie Foxx

This is extremely random and completely unlike me. The song literally just came up as I was listening to an old ‘favourites’ playlist of mine on the way to the gym. It made me smile so I thought I’d put this in.

That is it! Have an awesome week everyone!

5 of My Favourite Vegan Recipes

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1. Easy Baked Tofu – Domestic Superhero

Of course I had to start out with a tofu recipe. I always used to just pan-fry tofu which is obviously very bland and plain. But most recipes that I see are super elaborate and includes many odd ingredients that I don’t have, which I’m not a fan of. Whereas this only includes a handful of ingredients, all of which I happened to have at home (apologies if you don’t). It’s also quick and easy to throw together, which is perfect for me. In fact, I’m pretty sure I made this at least once a week the first month I stumbled upon it.

Note: This recipe calls for some honey, which can be easily substituted with maple syrup or agave nectar for a vegan version.

2. Sweet and Sour Tofu – Pickled Plum

Another tofu recipe, I know, but I promise this is the last. I thought I had to include this because I made it for a dinner party once and even my friends who don’t usually like tofu enjoyed it! This takes more time and effort, but I think it’s worth it. If you’re a fan of Chinese Sweet and Sour Pork, you’ll probably like this too.

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3. Quinoa Vegetable Soup – Cookie and Kate

Winter means soup weather for me. I love hearty, chunky vegetable soups on chilly evenings. This soup in particular is extra filling since it includes quinoa and legumes to keep you from getting hungry after 10 minutes (which is what usually happens to me). It’s also a great way to try cooking quinoa if you’re not a fan of using it to replace rice. I made this in my slow cooker, but you can also cook it on the hob if you prefer.

Note: Feel free to mix up the ingredients! Switch out the quinoa for rice or pasta; use vegetables that are available or in season; add lentils instead of chickpeas. Get creative with it!

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4. Coconut Red Lentil Dahl – Running on Real Food

Another warming food for the colder months. I never really knew how to cook lentils and make them taste good, until I tried this recipe. It’s surprisingly easy to make and doesn’t include too many difficult to find ingredients. This is the perfect dish to batch cook and save the leftovers for the rest of the week. It tastes great with rice or on its own.

5. Raw Brownie Bites – Detoxinista

I had to include something sweet here. I’ve a massive chocoholic, and this definitely curbs my sweet tooth. Again, it only uses simple ingredients, most of which you probably already have. These brownie bites are easy to make, and they’re another treat you can make a bunch of to store in the fridge for whenever you need a chocolate fix.

I hope you try out some of these recipes, and let me know in the comments if you do! Have fun cooking!

Liebster Award

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I’ve actually been nominated quite a while ago… aka probably nearly a month now. I don’t really have an excuse other than me being lazy. BUT I’m finally getting to it and it’s better late than never right…?

So I was actually nominated by two amazing fellow bloggers, Girl with the Paw Print Tattoo and Mental Health at Home. Thank you so much for nominating me and being so supportive!

What is the Liebster Award?

Liebster in German means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome. The award was discovered for bloggers to promote and support each other’s work. Check out The Global Aussie’s post for more information on the award.

Rules of the Liebster Award:

  1. Acknowledge the blog that gave it to you and display the award.
  2. Answer 11 questions that the blogger gives you.
  3. Give 11 random facts about yourself.
  4. Nominate 11 blogs and notify them of their nominations.
  5. Give them 11 questions to answer.

Now onto the questions!

  1. Why did you start blogging?

I started blogging because I had been doing a lot of writing at the time. I was going through quite a bit, and my form of outlet was through words. I would literally pour my heart out onto the page (or screen) and let it go. At the beginning, I was just using them as super long captions on Instagram. But eventually I thought it deserved more than just acting as decoration underneath a pretty picture, so I started this blog! It just felt right, as cheesy as it sounds, it was like my ‘calling’. I’ve always wanted to create my own thing, whatever it may be, and my friends were extremely encouraging. That was a long-winded answer. I promise the rest will be more concise.

2. What is your favorite movie?

About Time.

3. If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

Ah… There are so many places. Somewhere warm, near the ocean, away from the city, surrounded by trees and nature. Probably Bali or Hawaii, although that seems to be the ‘trendy’ thing to do right now and I don’t like to be conventional.

4. What is your favourite season?

Definitely summer. Firstly because I hate the cold. Secondly, I thrive on sunshine. Give me sun, water, plants, and I’ll be a happy bunny.

5. What is your favourite holiday?

I’ve actually gone off celebrating holidays lately. I guess my family was never big on holidays anyway, especially considering where I grew up. But if I had to choose I’d probably say Christmas because everyone seems to be extra jolly during that period.

6. Dogs or cats?

Do I really have to choose??? I love both, so the only reason I’m choosing dogs is because I like taking walks and having a dog with me would make me look less like a freak.

7. Coffee or tea?

Tea all day everyday! I try to stay away from stimulants like caffeine because I don’t mix well with them.

8. What is your favourite book?

This is a tough one. I’d say The Universe Has Your Back by Gabrielle Bernstein because it opened up a new world to me.

9. If you were only given one meal to eat for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Breakfast. I LOVE breakfast food. Oatmeal, avocado toast, pancakes, waffles… I’m so basic.

10. What is your favourite hobby?

Reading.

11. Who is your favourite band?

Coldplay. I told you I’m basic.

11 Random Facts About Me:

  1. I have a pentagon-shaped birthmark on the inside of my right arm.
  2. I like rubbing fluffy things against my face.
  3. I’m convinced I was a cat in my previous life.
  4. I rubbed a peach against my face when I was 8 and it stung horribly – biggest disappointment of my life.
  5. I have a scuba-diving license.
  6. I grew up in the city but love nature. I guess you want what you don’t have.
  7. I can only sleep in shorts no matter how cold it is.
  8. I’ve been on a kayaking expedition for 4 days and 3 nights.
  9. My dream is to run a farm and an animal sanctuary.
  10. Elephants are my spirit animal.
  11. I have 10 piercings in total.

Nominations:

My Questions for the Nominees:

  1. As a child, what did you want to be when you grow up?
  2. What is your favourite place on Earth?
  3. What is the weirdest dream you’ve ever had?
  4. What is your favourite quote or saying?
  5. What is your biggest pet peeve?
  6. Would you travel to Mars if it was free and safe to do so?
  7. What is your favourite thing about yourself?
  8. What are you most grateful for right now?
  9. What is the first thing you would grab if your house caught on fire?
  10. What are you most proud of doing or achieving?
  11. What is your perfect day like?

Thanks again for the nomination and congratulations to the nominees! I look forward to reading your answers!